Uniform Round-Up.....

Other than stadiums, there's nothing more classic about sports than the uniforms. So let me break down the CURRENT uni's out there and distinguish the brutal ones from the awesome. And a few "so-so's" mixed in.

Because being negative is more fun sometimes, lets start with the most brutal of the bunch (yes, these are in order from worstess to worst):

1. Atlanta Thrashers. Not only is this by far the worst name of a professional franchise, the uniforms are uglier than John Clayton. And NO, he's not my uncle.






2. Arizona Diamond Backs. Here's how I imagine the team meeting when this decision was made: "So listen guys, I know theres already a ton of National League teams with red in their unis, but what's one more right? Then lets take the most ridiculous font and put some crappy hip abbreviation of "Diamond Backs" on the jersey."





3. Toronto Blue Jays. For Pete's sake, you're a professional baseball team! How are these the new uniforms? Nothing special and the home jerseys have some weird blue jay morphed into a letter J. Give me Adobe Photoshop For Dummies and I'll have a better logo for you in the morning after I eat my Lucky Charms.



4. Tennessee Titans. Helmets Brutal, check. Titan logo stupid, check. Color Scheme something a Canadian Team football team would have, check. Its the Titans! You think a Titan would approve of this? Considering they carry swords, probably not.






5. Oklahoma City Thunder. "Which of these things is not like the other, one of these things just don't belong" (I hope most of you know that song). Chicago Bulls, Boston Celtics, Los Angeles Lakers, Oklahoma City Thunder? Not only do they have the worst logo of all time, but the colors are awfully close to #1 on the list. One of the options for team names was "Oklahoma City Barons" with Black, Gold, and White uni's. Who in that board room decided against that? I'll give you a hint, it was probably a woman! oh snap!!

HONORABLE MENTION: Jacksonville Jaguars, Florida Panthers, Sacramento Kings, Milwaukee Bucks, and St. Louis Rams.

Ok, that was fun. Now let's get to the classics. These are the top 5 uniforms in my opinion from the awesome-est to the awesome.



1. Oakland Athletics. Yes, they're in the Rangers division and Yes, their stadium is the 2nd worst in the league (I'll breakdown stadiums in a future blog, yay!), but these classic threads are the best in the biz. Haven't been touched since the late 80's. Why mess with perfection? Something about these uni's just makes me want to shoot up some steroids and write a book (Jose Canseco reference for those keeping score at home).


2. Dallas Cowboys. Biased opinion? Of course not! You don't become Americas team with average uniforms. The home jerseys are great, but those road blue's are a masterpiece. "Tony? You dont have anything funny or sarcastic to say about the Cowboys uni's?" I got nothing, just thinking about how awesome they are makes me get emotional. Give me a minute, Im actually getting emotional now. Talk amongst yourselves, I'll give you a topic, "Nicholas Cage in the Sorcerers Apprentice. End of a career?", go.



3. Pittsburgh Pirates. They may have the leagues worst record year after year, but at least they look good. Kinda like the guy that plays city softball and wears wristbands, under armor, and batting gloves but cant get it out of the infield.



4. Chicago Bears. Pure classic. I love the orange on blue and the socks are amazing. Too bad they destroyed Soldier Field with the brutal make over. When I think of the Bears, I think of Tecmo Bowl and destroying everybody with Walter Payton. Down....Set....Hut, Hut, Hut, Hut, Hut, Hut, Hut.





5. Los Angeles Lakers. As much as I hate to admit it, the Lakers uniforms are pretty awesome. The only team in the NBA who has standard colored jerseys for home games (except Sundays). But I still dont understand how these guys are world champions with Luke Walton, Jordan Farmar, Adam Morrison, and Sasha Vujacic on the team while the Mavs can't even beat a washed up spurs team. I guess Kobe and Phil Jackson really are that good.


HONORABLE MENTION: Los Angeles Dodgers, Chicago Blackhawks, Washington Redskins, Chicago White Sox, Boston Celtics, and Oakland Raiders.

Well, there you have it. This is my opinion on the best and worst uniforms in professional sports. If you disagree, chances are that you're wrong ;). If you're team or any others arent represented on this list, then you got yourself an average uniform.